[oclug] hoax/[oclug] Sorcerer GNU Linux (Humour)

[Pat]

Hrmmm.....  Seems we have one distro aimed at the Pagan/rpg crowd and
another at the fundamentalist crowd.

This is A) A good demonstration of Linux flexibility
           B) Quite frightening.

(the following is intended as humour.  I have tried to be  inclusive of
all faiths.  If you feel slighted because I have missed your faith,
please let me know and I will try to correct the omission)

B)
Scene: Installfest, somewhere, 2003.  An assorted group of geeks,
academics, long haired freaks and conservatively dressed
neo-conservatives are milling around a cluster of boxes in a remarakble
demonstration of brownian motion.

Freak: Hi I'm here to help you with your install.  Do you want the
Catholic distro or some Protestant variation?

Neo-con: Actually I was thinking of Gardenerian with some minor
Crowleian additions.....

Freak: Heathen!

Neo-con: Zealot!

<scene fades to red in the ensuing blood bath........>

..........................................................................................................

Possible implications of religiously based distros:

Christian Linuces will only have 10 comands.  Which 10 will vary by
sect.

The use of hard or soft links will depend on religious orientation.  the
doctrine of  transubstantiation would convert all soft links in a
Catholic system into hard links, whereas Protestant distros would use
all soft.....

crond will be re-written in Orthodox Jewish and certain other distros to
shut the whole system down on the sabbath.  Reform and Liberal Jewish
distros will allow some but not all  parts of the system to function
normally

Islamic distros will respect ramadan and only allow new software to be
installed/compiled between sunrise and sun set.

Pagan distros will allow you to delete files by sending them to the
wickerman.

Aetheist distros will have no root user because there is no all powerful
being.

Agnostic distros will allow root but not call it that.

Bogomips on pagan systems will vary with the wheel of the year and
depend on what gender the specific box is felt to have and by the
particular tradition of the os. e.g.  Dianic distro will vary with the
lunar not solar cycle and incidently not include floppy support.

Buddhists distros will be able to configured to perfection but will
delete themselves when perfection is reached...