[oclug] [Humor](Fwd) Nortel vs Beer

Dean Staff dean at protus.com
Fri Sep 7 15:44:58 EDT 2001

Just remember, this was written before Nortel stock fell below $9.

------- Forwarded message follows -------
Subject:        	FW: Nortel vs Beer
Date sent:      	Tue, 4 Sep 2001 08:05:22 -0400

On July 26, 2000, two friends, Jim and John, each got a  $1000 bonus at work. (They both work 
for Nortel Networks, where in the summer of 
2000, there was LOTS of money around for bonuses). 

Jim, being  an intelligent, financially concientious person, put the
whole $1000  into Nortel Networks stock. With his $1000, and the
transaction cost of $35, he was able to purchase 7 shares at $123 each. Having watched the 
Nortel stock climb and climb, he
felt very good about this investment, happy that he is preparing for the future.

John, being a more care-free sort, did something slightly different 
with his $1000. John borrowed a friend's truck, and proceeded to the Beer Store, where he 
purchased 33 cases of beer. John also
felt very good about his investment: 33 cases x 24 = is 792 bottles
of beer!  John, also being an intelligent guy, although perhaps not as forward-thinking as Jim, 
calculated that he could drink about 15 
bottles per week, and he wouldn't have to buy beer for a whole

Jim, of course, was appalled by John's purchase, and berated him
constantly about it. As months went by, Jim excitedly watched the stock prices, and saw it start to 
dwindle. "It'll go back up", he'd say to John.

John, who has been reaping the benefits of his investment on a daily
basis, would reply, "Ya, it will. Hang in there buddy".

Months went by, and the value of the stock continued to fall, and there was the beginnings of a 
noticeable dent in the beer pile.

Midwinter came, Jim's stock had fallen to about half of it's original value, and John's beer was 
about half gone. Jim, being sure that the
stock had hit rock-bottom, still was berating John for his frivolous
purchase, telling him "Your beer will be gone in six months! Who knows what my stock will be 

Well, summer has come, and hard times at Nortel continue. 
Bad news: Both John and Jim have been affected by the layoffs.

Last week, in order to raise some cash to help through
the rough time, Jim sold his 7 shares, at that day's value of $12, and got $84, then after paying the 
$35 transaction fee, he only had $49. Jim stopped by John's house later that day (everyone
needs their friend's during rough times), and as luck would have
it, there were two bottles of John's beer left. John, being a good,
compasionate friend, offered to share his last two bottles of beer with his friend. Jim appreciated 
the gesture, and enjoyed the cold beer on the  hot summer's day, but he felt a bit guilty. "At least I 
got fifty bucks back out of it - you have nothing now.", he said. 

"That's ok.", replied John. "Perhaps you can help me, I need to return all these empties.", he 
added as his other friend with
the truck pulled in. So, they loaded up the truck, and proceeded off to the beer store.

Upon arrival at the beer store, they unloaded the empties, feeling a
little grim. John went to the counter, and collected his refund for the bottles. "33 cases x 24 
bottles, at 10 cents per bottle, that comes to $79.20", the friendly Beer Store clerk said to John as
he handed him the money. 

Jim was speechless. Poor guy. Can you imagine how you
would feel if you just discovered that over the course of the last year, your $1000 stock investment 
left you with $50, and taking same 1000, buying beer, and drinking it, would leave you with $80. 

I'll leave it up to the reader to come up with they're
own "moral to  the story".

Have a nice day, and happy investing.

------- End of forwarded message -------

FYI Nortel is currently at $8.51 I'll let you figure out how much Jim stock would have net'ed him 

Dean Staff
Protus IP Solutions
210 - 2379 Holly Lane
Ottawa, ON K1V 7P2 Canada
613-733-0000 ex 546 Fax 613-248-4553
e-mail: dean at protus.com Web: http://www.protus.com

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