[oclug] Only in Canada, eh?

[Paul Godin]

For the fun of it.

35. +45 % of your pay goes to federal taxes.

36. They re-elect the same government that is responsible for the +45 % tax
on your pay.

37. They cut health care then blame you, the tax payer, for using the system
in the first place.

And finally,
38. There is no brain drain, it's just a figment of your imagination.

Paul G.


----- Original Message -----
From: "burns" <burns at burnsmacdonald.com>
To: <oclug at lists.oclug.on.ca>
Sent: Monday, January 01, 2001 1:45 PM
Subject: [oclug] Only in Canada, eh?


> You know you're from Canada when...
>
> 1. You only know three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.
>
> 2. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
>
> 3. The mosquitoes have landing lights.
>
> 4. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
>
> 5. You have 10 favorite recipes for moose meat.
>
> 6. Canadian Tire on any Saturday is busier than the toy stores at
> Christmas.
>
> 7. You live in a house that has no front step, yet the door is one
> meter above the ground.
>
> 8. You've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard.
>
> 9. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in
> with snow.
>
> 10.You think sexy lingerie is tube-socks and a flannel nightie with only
> 8 buttons.
>
> 11.You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car.
>
> 12.The local paper covers national and international headlines on 2
> pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
>
> 13. At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing
> plant.
>
> 14.The most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun.
>
> 15.Your snowblower gets stuck on the roof.
>
> 16.You think the start of deer season is a national holiday.
>
> 17.You head south to go to your cottage.
>
> 18.You frequently clean grease off your barbecue so the bears won't
> prowl on your deck.
>
> 19.You know which leaves make good toilet paper.
>
> 20.The major parish fund-raiser isn't bingo it's sausage making.
>
> 21.You find -40C a little chilly.
>
> 22.The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freeze.
>
> 23.You attend a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry
> and your Sorels.
>
> 24.You can play road hockey on skates.
>
> 25.You know 4 seasons: Winter, Still Winter, almost Winter and
> Construction.
>
> 26.The municipality buys a Zamboni (a vehicle for cleaning ice rink
> surfaces) before a bus.
>
> 27.You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
>
> 28.You perk up when you hear the theme from "Hockey Night in Canada".
>
> 29.You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your Canadian
> friends.
>
> 30. Only in Canada......are there handicap parking places in front of a
> skating rink.
>
> 31. People order double cheese burgers, large fries... and a diet coke.
>
> 32. We leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our
> useless junk in the garage.
>
> 33. Only in Canada.....do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
> process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
> 'bloodsucking creatures'.
>
> and
>
> 34. Only in Canada......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille
> lettering.
>
> Happy New Year all.
>
> --
> burns
>
>
> _______________________________________________
> oclug mailing list
> oclug at lists.oclug.on.ca
> http://www.oclug.on.ca/mailman/listinfo/oclug